None of that Sissy Crap
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>
> Are you tired of those sissy "friendship" poems that always sound good,
> But never actually come close to reality?
> Well, here is a series of promises that actually speak of true friendship.
> You will see no cutesy little smiley faces on this card-
> Just the stone cold truth of our great friendship.
>
> 1. When you are sad -- I will help you get drunk and plot revenge against the sorry bastard who made you sad.
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> 2. When you are blue -- I will try to dislodge whatever is choking you.
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> 3. When you smile -- I will know you finally got laid.
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> 4. When you are scared -- I will rag on you about it every chance I get.
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> 5. When you are worried -- I will tell you horrible stories about how much worse it could be until you quit whining.
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> 6. When you are confused -- I will use little words.
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> 7. When you are sick -- Stay the hell away from me until you are well again. I don't want whatever you have.
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> 8. When you fall -- I will point and laugh at your clumsy ass.
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> Send this to 10 of your closest friends,
> Then get depressed because you can only think of 4.
>
> Friendship is like peeing your pants, everyone can see it,
> But only you can feel the true warmth.
>
> And always remember....wh en life hands you Lemons, ask for tequila and salt and call me over!!!!!
I just got this in an email and thought it was too funny.