Author Topic: Which One Are You?  (Read 2968 times)

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Offline SuperSix

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Which One Are You?
« on: February 10 2010, 11:13:56 AM »
Are you a Democrat, a Republican, or a Southerner?  

Here is a little test that will help you decide.
The answer can be found by posing the following question:  

You're walking down a deserted street with your wife and two small children.
Suddenly, an Islamic terrorist with a huge knife comes around the corner,
locks eyes with you, screams obscenities, praises Allah, raises the knife, and charges at you...
You are carrying a Kimber 1911 cal. 45 ACP, and you are an expert shot.  
You have mere seconds before he reaches you and your family.

What do you do?  
.............. ..... .............. ..... .............. ..... ........  

Democrat's answer:  
Well, that's not enough information to answer the question!
Does the man look poor or oppressed?
Have I ever done anything to him that would inspire him to attack?
Could we run away?
What does my wife think?
What about the kids?
Could I possibly swing the gun like a club and knock the knife out of  his hand?
What does the law say about this situation?  
Does the pistol have appropriate safety built into it?
Why am I carrying a loaded gun anyway, and what kind of message does this send to society and to my  children?
Is it possible he'd be happy with just killing me?
Does he definitely want to kill me, or would he be content just to wound me?
If I were to grab his knees and hold on, could my family get away while he was stabbing  me?
Should I call 9-1-1?
Why is this street so deserted?
We need to raise taxes, have paint and weed day and make this happier, healthier street that would discourage such behavior.
This is all so confusing!  
I need to debate this with some friends for few days and try to come to a consensus.  
.............. ..... .............. ..... .............. ..... .............. ...

Republican
'87 GN, 60lb, TA49, THDP, FTP cam, T+ lots o' shit - SOLD
'07 Ford F150 Lariat 2WD, 5.4L 3v - 255k
'20 Kubota BX2380. FEL, 60" deck
'78 IH/Case 184 Lo-Boy
'99 Kawasaki Bayou 400 4x4

Offline Zap

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Re: Which One Are You?
« Reply #1 on: February 10 2010, 01:12:11 PM »
Southerner!!
You can't get sweet shit outta a sour asshole

Offline SuperSix

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Re: Which One Are You?
« Reply #2 on: February 10 2010, 01:36:35 PM »
Quote from: "Zap @ Wed Feb 10, 2010 1:12 pm"
Southerner!![/quote

Shocking.
'87 GN, 60lb, TA49, THDP, FTP cam, T+ lots o' shit - SOLD
'07 Ford F150 Lariat 2WD, 5.4L 3v - 255k
'20 Kubota BX2380. FEL, 60" deck
'78 IH/Case 184 Lo-Boy
'99 Kawasaki Bayou 400 4x4

Offline Zap

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Re: Which One Are You?
« Reply #3 on: February 10 2010, 02:25:40 PM »
I know! But I prefer COR BON +P hollow points.
You can't get sweet shit outta a sour asshole

Offline TSM Girl

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Re: Which One Are You?
« Reply #4 on: February 10 2010, 02:47:38 PM »
Southerner.  :smt071
Donna

"Stupid people should NOT breed!"

Offline Wrecked Em

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Re: Which One Are You?
« Reply #5 on: February 10 2010, 06:48:19 PM »
Southerner, we do live in TN!

You have to love a state that has groups such as this...

The Tennessee League of the South remembers that
from Magna Carta on Runnymeade
to the Declaration of Independence in Philadelphia
to the Virginia and Kentucky Resolutions of Madison and Jefferson
to Calhoun's arguments for nullification
to the Tennessee vote for secession on 8 June 1861,
our grandfathers stood and fought for liberty.

Today liberty is but a faint memory. We challenge you to identify just one area of your life that has not come under the scrutiny and control of the federal Empire.

It is time to regain our heritage.
It is time to renew the struggle for liberty.
It is time to once again raise the battle cry for freedom !!

DCEPTCN

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Re: Which One Are You?
« Reply #6 on: February 14 2010, 07:25:30 PM »
Being as I'm torn between the answers for Republican and Southerner I'm voting Independent. I hope it illustrates to both the aforementioned parties that ~3 slugs from a 1911 are enough to kill even the most crazed/determined/Goliath attacker and that ammunition is just way too expensive to go liquifying anything you happen upon. Furthermore, Southerners aren't widely known for their wits and therefor I present the follow-up question:

Another whacked Mustard (pronounce the 's' as a 'z') rounds the corner with the intent of avenging his brother that lays slain at your feet.

Democrat: My head's already been sawn off, what the fuck are you asking me for?!

Southerner: *Click* Ah fuck...quick cindy, show 'im yer yams!

Republican: See above. Funny how my answers are usually pretty prudent the first time around, isn't it?

Offline Zap

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Which One Are You?
« Reply #7 on: February 14 2010, 07:49:57 PM »
I pronounce it Muss-Turd
You can't get sweet shit outta a sour asshole

DCEPTCN

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Re: Which One Are You?
« Reply #8 on: February 14 2010, 07:53:28 PM »
I wish you'd be pronounced DOA.

Offline Zap

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Re: Which One Are You?
« Reply #9 on: February 14 2010, 07:55:57 PM »
You're thinking of Steve Wood
You can't get sweet shit outta a sour asshole

DCEPTCN

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Re: Which One Are You?
« Reply #10 on: February 14 2010, 07:58:04 PM »
Quote from: "Zap @ Sun Feb 14, 2010 5:55 pm"
You're thinking of Steve Wood
That's like hoping that spring will come...?

 

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