Frank Feldman

[Steve Wood]

A man walks out to the street and catches a taxi just going by. He gets into the taxi, and the cabbie says,

"Perfect timing. You're just like Frank."

Passenger: 'Who?'

Cabbie: "Frank Feldman. He's a guy who did everything right all the time. Like my coming along when you needed a cab, things happened like that to Frank Feldman every single time."

Passenger: "There are always a few clouds over everybody."

Cabbie: "Not Frank Feldman He was a terrific athlete. He could have won the Grand-Slam at tennis. He could golf with the pros. He sang like an opera baritone and danced like a Broadway star and you should have heard him play

the piano. He was an amazing guy."

Passenger: "Sounds like he was something really special."

Cabbie: "There's more... He had a memory like a computer. He remembered everybody's birthday. He knew all about wine, which foods to order and which fork to eat them with. He could fix anything. Not like me. I change a fuse, and the whole street blacks out. But Frank Feldman,

he could do everything right."

Passenger: "Wow, some guy then."

Cabbie: "He always knew the quickest way to go in traffic and avoid traffic jams. Not like me, I always seem to get stuck in them. But Frank, he never made

a mistake, and he really knew how to treat a woman and

make her feel good. He would never answer her back even if she was in the wrong; and his clothing was always immaculate, shoes highly polished too. He was the perfect man! He never made a mistake. No one could ever measure up to Frank Feldman."

Passenger: "An amazing fellow. How did you meet him?"

Cabbie: "Well, I never actually met Frank. He died. I'm married to his f** kin' widow."

[DCEPTCN]

Nice...!


...*but*, you can say 'fuck' all day on this board.

[Steve Wood]

Why would I wish to say fuck all day long?  Then the word has absolutely no meaning contextually and simply becomes filler for a lack of vocabulary.

Just because Zippy says it here does not make it the universal substitute for a better word.

I am sure the Cosmos have rounded corners from such an overindulgence in one word that has reduced not only the English language, but, languages across the several oceans, to monosyllabus garbage.

Why are you picking on me, anyway?  You may need shelter and cabrito before the coming storm.

[Zap]

It's simply an acronym, any untoward meaning lies in the mind of the reader. Fuck em.

[Steve Wood]

I beg to point out that no one spoke of untoward meanings, or toward meanings, for that matter.  The subject was the substitution of the word in daily language to eliminate the need for one's basic 1000 word vocabulary.

Thus rendering suspected idiots into certified idiots........ .add your verb of choice to make this a sentence...wai t, I know your verb of choice........ .............. .

[Zap]

Frank Feldman wouldn't feel that way.

[Steve Wood]

Only because of his moribund state!

[Zap]

Only because of his moribund state!

He's from WV too?  

[Top Speed]

WTF were we talking about again?

[DCEPTCN]

WTF were we talking about again?

Nothing. A whole bunch of fucking nothing. If you would be so kind, patronize The 'Saurus but refrain from feeding it...or even looking in it's direction or it's likely to rattle it's cage or even threaten to barrage you with a veritable shitstorm of pomposity and diction-laden condescension. Actually, you'd do well to avoid it altogether lest you be stuck in front of the computer whipping up your own blather-lather until the stars burn out in defense of any and all posts that you may or may not have made that the Vocabuloon mistook for personal affronts.

Fuck, fuck, encephalon, fuck, infarction, desultory, fuck, contusion, fuck.

[Steve Wood]

Contusions do lead to confusion.  I would not at all be surprised to discover that is the means through which you ended up in a Dempsy on your birth day.

[DCEPTCN]

I've given up birthdays, but age makes me wiser still. For instance, now I know why there are so many windmills in TX.  :phpbbt;

[Steve Wood]

Now you are confusing knowledge with wisdom....Gras shopper

[DCEPTCN]

Now you are confusing knowledge with wisdom....Gras shopper

No sir! I'm the type that cannot go along with the notion that one can or should discern between the 'brain' and the 'mind'. Furthermore, through synaptic bio-electrical and -chemical transmissions (that I can never hope to understand fully), what is called 'spirit', 'soul' and the like is similarly only the function of flesh. Some can never fully come to terms with this, but it doesn't discount one's strongest emotions in the least that they are simply/ultimatety physical commands that have been hardwired by untold millenia of perfect Darwinistic elimination vs procreation... .and I prefer 'Locust'. Fuck, fuck, fuckity-fuck.

[TSM Girl]

I've given up birthdays, but age makes me wiser still. For instance, now I know why there are so many windmills in TX.