Katie Couric, Charlie Gibson, Brian Williams and a tough old U.S.
Marine Sergeant were captured by terrorists in Iraq . The leader of
the Iraqi terrorists told them he'd grant each of them one last request
before they were beheaded and dragged naked through the streets.
Katie Couric said, ''Well, I'm a Southerner, so I'd like one last plate
of fried chicken.'' The leader nodded to an underling who left and
returned with the chicken. Couric ate it all and said, ''Now I can die
content.''
Charlie Gibson said, ''I live in New York , so I'd like to hear the
song The Moon and Me' one last time..'' The terrorist's leader nodded
to another terrorist who had studied the Western world and knew the
music. He returned with some rag-tag musicians and played the song.
Gibson was satisfied.
Brian Williams said, ''I'm a reporter to the end. I want to take out my
tape recorder and describe the scene here and what's about to happen.
Maybe, someday, someone will hear it and know that I was on the job
till the end.'' The leader directed an aide to hand over the tape
recorder and Williams dictated his comments. He then said, ''Now I can
die happy.''
The leader turned and said, ''And now, Mr. US Marine, what is your
final wish?''
''Kick me in the ass,'' said the Marine.
''What?'' asked the Islamic terrorist, 'Will you mock us in your last
hour?''
''No, I'm NOT kidding. I want you to kick me in the ass,'' insisted the
Marine.
So the terrorist shoved him into the yard and kicked him in the ass.
The Marine went sprawling, but rolled to his knees, pulled a 9 mm pistol
from inside his cammies and shot the leader dead. In the resulting
confusion, he emptied his sidearm on six terrorists, with his knife he
slashed the throat of one with an AK-47, which he took, and sprayed the
rest of the terrorists killing another 11!
In a flash, all of them were either dead or fleeing for their lives.
As the Marine was untying Couric, Gibson and Williams, they asked him,
''Why didn't you just shoot them all in the first place? Why did you
ask him to kick you in the ass?''
''What!?!'' replied the Marine, ''and have you three assholes report
that I was the aggressor?''